The Bad and The Sad

The Bad is that my book manuscript keeps getting reviewed by academic publishers who eventually, after "reviewing" it for a very long time, do not publish it.

The Sad is that since October of 2011, when I sent out the first proposal, to today--almost two years--I have been going nuts because:

a) many people in the academic publishing industry will not return your calls and/or emails, even when they have had your manuscript under review for, oh, say, a year.

b) bad news keeps rolling in

This sucks also for everyone around me because they have to listen to me weep and rant about the above. They have to listen to that for, like, years.

Reader, this is my story:

After circulating the proposal to about twelve publishers, the majority of whom rejected it, I got word from several presses that wanted to review the full manuscript. I picked one and sent it to them.
This part took: three months. 


The manuscript sat on someone's desk at that press, despite what editorial staff claimed in their very infrequent replies to my many emails. In the meantime, I spent my research leave, which is supposed to be spent revising one's manuscript, doing other projects. 
This part took: seven months. 

The ms. finally went for review. The editor, whom I spent over a thousand dollars to meet in person at a far-away conference, told me that everything was going to be fine and that I shouldn't worry.
This part took: four months.

One positive review came back. I told the editor that I needed the process to speed up, because of tenure. The editor told me to take the book elsewhere because the process could not be sped up. I began to send the proposal out again.
This part took: three weeks.

As I circulated the proposal for a second time, I learned that one of the presses that initially wanted the ms.--a press that was a very likely home for the ms.--now, for reasons that had nothing to do with the ms. but everything to do with the fact that a year had elapsed, no longer wanted it. But a new press was interested; the series editor emailed me directly and asked to see the proposal. And a second new press wanted it, too! I sent the manuscript for review to both of these new presses (with the knowledge of the editors) and pulled it from the old one that had had it for a year.
This part took: two weeks. 

The one of the new presses quickly got two readers' reports! The series and acquisitions editors were enthusiastic!
This part took: two months. 

The editor at this press suddenly stopped returning my emails. Then s/he told me that the manuscript needed to go to the press's editorial board before I began revisions per the two readers' reports, because there was a concern that the book might not be a good fit in the series. But everyone--people at my work, me, friends--thought this was just a formality. And in the meantime, I did revisions per the two reports. These entailed traveling to Berlin to do additional research. Then, editorial board at this press axed the project because they felt that the book was not a good fit in the list (despite the series editor's enthusiasm). Meanwhile, the second new press that had the manuscript under review stopped returning my emails and did not respond to my phone calls. I was back to square one.
This part took: two months.

I freaked out and began to repeat things like, "Before, when the first press sat on it for more than a year and then dumped it, this was a scenario where someone would possibly not get tenure, but now, this is exactly the situation where someone does not get tenure" and "I want to lose my job. I want the manuscript to go unpublished. If my career is going to go down in flames, I want it to go down spectacularly and completely, like the Titanic, not two-bit and weird, like Anthony Wiener's mayoral candidacy." CC got me to calm down enough to send the proposal out again because, as she helped me realize, losing my job would be bad for our joint financial situation, and in the future I would like continue to buy things like lattes and new pants. I sent the proposal out, for a third time.
This part took: two weeks.

But then something that seems like it might be good happened. A press that had initially been interested in reviewing the ms. back in 2011 responded right away to the new round of proposals and asked to review the ms., and even offered an advance contract. And then they agreed to use the reader's reports that the previous press got. So I am back to square two. So that is really good, right?
This part took: one week.

So that might be good. I will have to wait and see. For sure something could go wrong!

Pier review

I want also to say this:

Have you noticed how like two different peer reviewers will have totally different reactions to things?  Ok, Ok, often they both don't like the same thing.

But dudes. Often Reviewer A hates something and Reviewer B doesn't care about it, but hates something else. That happens a lot too.

I am just saying. Pier review is not all that helpful, I think we can all get behind that sentiment. But what about peer review?

peer review is censorship

Have you ever noticed in somebody's book where in the intro they totally disavow some term/concept, like, 'there is a literature on term/concept X, and some of it is relevant to this project, but X is also totally not applicable to the cases I'm looking at, and so I would never use term/concept X, I am not going to write X never, ever.'

And then in the chapters of the book they basically prove that concept X does indeed apply to their cases. But they never use the actual term X. You know?

That's because of peer review. The peer reviewers told them to take out X. So they did--sort of.

That is totally going to be me. 

Could be worse

Just to update this situation: the book manuscript suffered disaster in the wacky, wacky land beyond the Misty Mountains that is the academic publishing industry. But not nearly the worst kind of disaster.

I have heard much worse. I should not complain, really.

Things are bad for book manuscripts in the land of academic publishing.

 Yeah, that bad.

(For anyone who does not recognize that volcano, it's in Mordor. Recent conversation with CC while watching a certain HBO series:

Me: Do you know what is going on even though you did not watch the books? Do you want me to say who that guy is?

CC: No, I know.

[long pause]

CC: Is this the one where they are going to meet elves to get some kind of jewels?

Me: Uh, do you mean rings?

CC: Yes!

Me: No. This is the other one.)

Somewhere out there in the universe

Some thing about readers' reports that I am thinking may in fact be the case--

They always take too long to come back. Your manuscript's reports are taking for ever, way longer than you thought or anyone said. Yeah. That always happens. Ask around.

Some thing about readers' reports that is weird--

Somewhere, out in the universe, my book ms. is sitting on someone's desk or something, stressing them out because they were supposed to read it months ago but they didn't. Maybe sometimes they put their coffee or tea cup on the cover page and now it has a few stray stains. But I don't even know who these people are, and there's no way to tell. Where is the desk upon which the ms. is sitting stressing someone out? In a warm place? In a rainy place?

Maybe the person is not even stressed out about it. Hmm. A few times I have said to senior people that my readers' reports are months overdue, and the people said, 'Oh, that reminds me, I am supposed to read this ms. and the report was due months ago. I really should try to get to that soon.' But they did not sound at all stressed about this.

Sleep

CC and me are writing this post as joint authors. We talked about what we would write about and decided to write about sleep.

We chose this topic because sleep is good, and because we talk a lot about how much each of us likes to sleep and how hard it is to wake up. Really, it's how hard it is to wake up. I (YSA) talk a lot about that.

CC: Today I had to meet a student at 9 am, and I felt like 9 am was too early, especially for a Friday, but when I got there on time the student was already there editing his paper. This is the only student in danger of failing the class. I told him I was impressed with his dedication, and he responded that he feels that he has to use every minute of the day in order to succeed.

YSA: I don't feel like people really appreciate how hard it is to get out of bed. It (sleep) is like a drug. Like a drug! It does not matter what I resolve the night before when I go to bed or what I set the alarm for, or if I set two alarms, or if I pledge to CC that I will get up and not hit snooze for one hour. Nothing matters. When the sleep is happening, nothing else matters. I will hit snooze for two hours, or take the batteries out of the alarm clock, whatever.

CC: YSA is not exaggerating. She is never realistic about her waking-up goals and as a result constantly feels guilty. LIke, every morning, she wakes up and faces the day... already guilty. This is a problem for her, and as a consequence, for me, too.

YSA: That is so true!


CC: The guilt is contagious. I also feel guilty, even though I had no waking up goals to begin with! (I gave these up as soon as I became a grad student - or rather, chose this profession partially because it allows me to sleep in.)

[Side comment: CC: Is being a grad student a profession? YSA: Yes. CC: No.]

YSA, do you have any more comments?

YSA: No. Just that it is very hard to get up.

Pity Party

I am sorry that I have not posted. I have not really been working on my diss. I just feel so bad about it! I feel bad, baaaad about it.

But the time is ticking away. If I don't file it soon, I'll not be able to take the post doc. Which means having no money. I don't think academias' all that great, and my diss is a diss-aster, and I don't want to teach, etc.. But I need money. I need to buy some pants, by God. And some burritos.

So I have to work on it. And therefore, I have to post. Post till its done! Yay!

JM said working on her diss is like having her own private Iraq. Which is kind of how I have felt lately. Not to blow things out of proportion too much.

Woe is me

My computer, Sweetie Pants, broke somehow and wouldn't turn on. I took it to the Apple Store that never closes, and they are supposed to be repairing it. But it is taking a long time.

I feel sad and lost without my laptop. Is that super weird? CC is letting me use her's; she is very nice.

Other problem

I have other problems, too.

Example

Here is what it says in the court document:

In June 1924, two plainclothes police men were on patrol when someone came up to them on the street and invited them to a party. They went and at the party, a woman named Z. approached one of the policemen and told him "that she had learned something beautiful/lovely and would soon do something enticing." Z. and [another woman] S. danced together, with only short skirts, and pulled up [their skirts] so that their pubic hair and “sexual parts” were visible. “After this show it was given out that something particularly interesting and pikantes was coming.” Then S. took off all her clothes except for her bra and lay on the table on her back. “Z. appeared similarly naked, put her heads between the thighs of S. and kissed and licked the sexual parts therein.”

Problem: How much of this do I put in my dissertation?

Right now, I have it like this:

"Z. and another woman danced together, removing their clothing as they did so. “After this show,” the police told a judge later, “the word was put out that something particularly interesting and spicy (pikantes) was coming.” What followed was an oral sex show featuring both women clad only in their bras."

More complaining

I am feeling very sorry for myself lately and you should too, dear reader. Here, I will say why.

It is not fair that it is so hard to get a PhD. It is unfair.

What makes me think this is that the dissertation is so hard to write. It's like, always like this with this fucking degree, when you are taking exams you are like, "well, this is orders of magnitude harder than anything I've done in school before," then when you are in another friggin country reading in the archives you are like, "gee, what the hell was I thinking, this is beyond-belief difficult," but try actually writing a dissertation, baby!!! Now I am like, "hmm, I had it pretty easy going to the archive every day, all I had to do was copy what other people wrote."

It's lovely that nothing you do in the first 3 years of grad school prepares you at all for the dissertation part. That was great planning. Way to go, grad school.

Oh, wait but now I found these great tips, I am saved!

No, not really. Those tips suck. No one can save me.